I made a resolution to myself this year (I am not sure if you are supposed to tell your resolution...but what the h#ll) that I would speak about myself using only positive terms. I would, for lack of a better explanation, "Practice What I Preach". I am not sure what happened, but I am sure of this much. Being positive these days seems to be hard. I tried to send an email to a group that I am on the governing body of and was summarily thanked and reprimanded at the same time. BEFORE YOU START GUESSING WHICH GROUP THIS IS....I ASK THAT YOU DON'T. The point of this rant is just for me to get some words out.
Perhaps the adage "No good deed goes unpunished" IS true. The intention of my email was to be positive. The response was: (1) Great News!; (2) Umm...Maybe someone else should be doing this? ?? ; (3) I know you are tired...don't take this personally and (4) "Oh, and by the way....(to paraphrase) perhaps you should run your ideas through me because I have been receiving complaints about the emails that 'people' have been sending out"
Perhaps with the onset of the information age, people are indeed overwhelmed. I am a member of a small group of individuals in an organization. Many of us have known each other for years. I DO take things personally.
I am so unbelievably overwhelmed. I am trying to (please say it will happen) finish my dissertation proposal.....fulfill promises given to do technology training (that was poorly planned on topics that are neither useful or that I give a flying f*ck about), pan a presentation for a major conference (my choice..but I've been presenting for 11 years)....it should be easy, maintain a day job as a teacher...THAT HAS BECOME SO STRESSFUL DUE TO NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND that words escape me, tutor students for my school on Saturdays (after being guilted into it.because I "do a good job"), teach a night job two nights a week and train teachers 1 Saturday a month...which I also love....along with other committments that require an AWESOME calendar.
I do not expect special considerations. I do expect people to at least approach me personally to address issues...and temper that approach with the fact that they know I always want to make everyone else look good....in that is joy.
I realized Monday morning when I knew I had two meetings scheduled AT THE SAME TIME...in two different locations by two different people who BOTH expected I would be there...that it was going to be a long week. But this week is the rule....not the exception. I have officially made my best friend extremely mad at me because I have no time to see her....maybe one day she'll understand.
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